I know, I know. You’re going to say I deserved this. Remember a few weeks ago when I rather smugly wrote about my kitchen makeover? How I crowed that thanks to my careful planning and coordination, the entire project — minus the backsplash — took a mere matter of days? I spoke too soon.
True, all was going swimmingly. The new counters, cabinet hardware, sink and faucet all went in without a hitch. I was waiting until the counters were installed to choose new backsplash tile, so I could see it in my light. After the counters were in, I dragged home 10 samples from two tile stores. These are heavy. If you ever want to sink a dead body in a lake, use tile samples. I picked one and waited a week for the order to arrive.
Then I called my handyman, Richard Swann. I have not found any job around the house he can’t do. The only problem with Richard is there is only one of him. When I told him I was ready to have him install the backsplash, he said he would send his tile guy, whom we’ll call Joey.
Joey arrived the next morning at 8:30 and got right to work. He zipped along installing the warm white, 2- by 8-inch tiles in a horizontal subway style with staggered joints, nothing fancy. After the tile was up, he swiped on the grout, wiped up and was out the door by 5:30 p.m. When it got dark, I turned on the lights. That’s when I noticed the tile edges poking up at angles and lines that looked like waves. Maybe I was just being too critical, but when my husband came home, he said, “Are the tiles supposed to be crooked like that?”
I texted a picture of the uneven backsplash to Richard and said, “Seems like the tile should lie flat, shouldn’t it?”
“Yes, it should,” he replied. “We will fix.”
Here’s my philosophy: Every business makes mistakes now and then. Take Southwest. What counts is not that they mess up, but how they fix it.
To confirm this wasn’t just me, I texted the photos to my salesperson at the tile store, whose husband is also an installer. They’ve seen a lot of backsplashes. “Unfortunately,” she texted back, “it looks like he didn’t check with a level to see if the wall was flat. The only way to fix this is to take the tile down and start over.”
I called Richard. Joey came back the next day and took down the rock-and-roll tile. A few days later, Richard returned.
“I tell my tilers,” he said, “their number one job is to install the tile straight, square and flat.”
He made no excuses. He leveled the wall, installed a backer board level and true, scraped the thin set off the tiles, so we could reuse them, and reset the tile using a laser beam to keep the joints perfectly square. And 36 hours later he applied the grout.
After 30 years of installing tile, Richard has this advice to offer:
Get a good installer: Tile looks only as good as its installation. Consider getting a referral from a specialty tile store.
Assess before you start: Proper prep separates the amateur from the pro. Before setting the first tile, a pro makes sure the surface is ready and any blemishes are fixed before tile goes up and amplifies the problems.
Start with a flat surface: Use a level to make sure your substrate, whether a wall or floor, is even. If it’s not, flatten out the humps and fill in the lows.
Be square: The most common mistake Richard sees is tile that is not laid square. Laser levels emit beams of light on walls and floors that help you keep tile lines perfectly straight.
Know how to cheat: Very few walls or floors have perfect right angles, so tile that is set straight can still look slanted. You need to anticipate where the flaws are and make subtle adjustments to trick the eye.
Don’t rush: Generally, it is not a good idea to install tile and grout on the same day. Give tile a day or more to set.Work small. Today’s grouts dry fast. To make sure grout goes where you want it (between the joints) and not where you don’t (on the surface of the tile), apply wet grout firmly using a float. Press it into joints, then wipe it off the surface with a clean, only slightly damp sponge before it hardens.
Act fast: If you do see a mistake once tile is in, remove it quickly.
Marni Jameson is the author of six home and lifestyle books, including “What to Do With Everything You Own to Leave the Legacy You Want,” “Downsizing the Family Home – What to Save, What to Let Go” and “Downsizing the Blended Home – When Two Households Become One.” Reach her at www.marnijameson.com.
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