This year has seen us do a kitchen makeover, move daughter and husband into a new home, contend with houseguests and battle mosquitos — and learn some lessons along the way. Last week, I shared highlights from the first half of 2022. Here are top takeaways from the last six months.
In July, I lurched into the treacherous realm of mother-in-law-dom, flying in to “help” after my daughter and her husband bought a new home. I flew in to “help.” While my daughter’s top priority was to replace the shower in their bathroom, I thought they might need a bathroom remodel. That suggestion was met with silence. Eventually, they consulted a contractor, then an interior designer who said the same thing, but it was just better in every way coming from them.
Lesson: When your kids are setting up house, zip your lip. If asked, you can offer your opinion, but they will very likely come to the right conclusion without you. Meanwhile, you won’t risk being added to the not-welcome list.
In August, I vanquished mosquitoes on my patio. Really. Initially, I had dismissed the email pitch about a new smart mosquito system that lets you release mosquito repellant in a defined area using a phone app. The system lets off a synthetic version of a substance in chrysanthemums that we can’t smell but small biting insects can, and they don’t like it. It sounded far-fetched, but I read reviews about the new Thermacell LIV. Then I talked to a few outdoorsmen who verified that the company has been making a portable version of this mosquito repeller for a couple decades, and they wouldn’t think of going hunting or fishing without one clipped to their belts. So I gave it a try.
Lesson: Although men’s hunting tales rarely apply to better home design, this one does. I have spent hours per day of bite-free time enjoying my patio. I’m stunned. Even better, so are the mosquitoes. Recently TIME Magazine listed Thermacell LIV as one of the best inventions of 2022.
In September, I talked with a sort-of design psychic. That was a first. Interior designer Margarita Bravo visited my home virtually to give me a “design reading.” Over FaceTime, she rattled off her impressions: I wasn’t afraid of color. I have a curated mix of traditional, rustic and glam. Art is important to me, and my home really says, “This is who I am.” Phew!
Lesson: Bravo’s exercise reminded me: You’re not after a look. You’re after your look. Interior design is not about having a house that looks a certain way but about showcasing the personality of those who live there.
In October, I wrote about the dos and don’ts of being a good houseguest, from the three-day rule to other unwritten laws.
Lesson: We all need a little reminder before we wear out our welcomes: Wait to be invited. Mind your things. Don’t snoop. Pitch in. Chip in. Don’t arrive early and don’t overstay.
In November, I explored the question of what makes people move. At the core of most moves ─ whether to a house bigger or smaller, in or out of a city, or in a warmer or colder climate ─ lies the hope that on the other side, life will be better. Otherwise, why would anyone dismantle their home, put all their worldly possessions in boxes and trucks and yank themselves like rootbound molars out of their communities? So I was intrigued by a study that found that 26% of Americans moved to a new state in the last five years. Among those who didn’t, some 63% thought of doing it. And of those who did move, 88% were happy they did.
Lesson: You get one life. Spend it where you want to be.
In December, my kitchen makeover materialized. Thank you for coming along as I navigated the worlds of countertop decisions, appliances, faucets, hardware, sinks and more. To avoid the two worries we all have when we renovate ─ that it will cost a lot more and take a lot longer ─ I followed my own advice. Before starting, I had all the materials not just ordered but on site. I had the workers lined up along with their quotes and once rolling, I didn’t change my mind.
Lesson: The formula works: Dream. Plan. Execute. After years of dreaming, weeks of planning, and a few days of inconvenience, I got the kitchen I wanted.
Wishing you a feather-down, clutter-free, on-budget, wish-filled 2023.
Marni Jameson is the author of six home and lifestyle books, including “What to Do With Everything You Own to Leave the Legacy You Want,” “Downsizing the Family Home – What to Save, What to Let Go” and “Downsizing the Blended Home – When Two Households Become One.” Reach her at www.marnijameson.com.
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